Kristy 0:06

Welcome to Unshaken, the podcast where unwavering faith means real life. I'm Christy, and together with my husband Tony, we dive into authentic conversations, offering biblical insights and sharing stories that inspire resilience, especially for families navigating the unique challenges of disabilities. Join us each week as we explore faith family and the journeys that keep us grounded in Christ. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode. Let's stand firm together. Hi, Unshaken family. It's Christy, and I'm here with Tony. Just super stoked to be with you guys today because as Tony and I have talked through this episode this week and just made our notes and kind of really thought through and prayed through what we were gonna talk about. It has occurred to me that this is one of my favorites. Like I think I was telling Tony I think this might be my second favorite episode. What we want to talk about is what God understands about you that others don't. And I would like to pitch that your relationship with God, I think it's the easiest relationship that you have. It's for me, it is certainly far and away the easiest relationship that I have. Before I go real far, I want to um I want to just make a little caveat here that if you are someone for whom your relationship with God is not feeling super easy or light or safe necessarily, I just would like to invite you to stay with us here. Let's just see if we can maybe give you an alternate perspective on that. My starting place is this no matter how close your friends are, your spouse, your, you know, your kids, whoever that you you talk to, your co-workers, no matter how um how well they know you and you know them, there's always some sort of explanation when we take new information. We gotta share the context, we've got to give the backstory, we've gotta um, we've got to set the scene, you know, and um just give clarity on what we meant. And I feel like with God, that's just not there because he knows there is no, there's nothing that he doesn't know. He understands our context. We don't have to do any sort of character development, you know, about the people that we work with or, you know, explain our mindset or what our goals are, because he knows already. With God, there is no onboarding process. You know, he has your entire history. God didn't meet you six months ago or a year ago, even if your close relationship with him is new, he's known you since the beginning. And so there's no time where you have to explain, you know, like let's say you um, I mean, it's it's easy sometimes, right, when we we run into those old friends maybe from high school, or you know, there's friends that we associate with a specific time in our lives because it's easy to go back to the setting of the story that we're gonna talk about, and they already have that information, right? God has that no matter what we talk about. You don't have to translate, you don't have to manage, you don't have to say specific words or be careful to explain. You know, it's just be you just be real. You can let your hair down, you can have your hair wet, you know, and go as the most authentic backstage version version of yourself because that's what kind of relationship it is. And that's what this episode is about. It's that easy, light, welcoming relationship with God. I don't mean um any of these things to imply that it's shallow or that it's not valuable because it's it's it's not transactional. What I really mean is that God already knows you. He knows everything about you. There's no explanations required. Um, if there's no shame, you don't have to be ashamed or embarrassed. You don't have to tell him anything hard that he doesn't already know. There's just tremendous, I think, relational ease. It's like going home, right? You know, when you go home to somebody, maybe it's your spouse or go back home to your parents, or or I know for me, you know, as I've been coming up, when I was, especially when I was away at school and whatever, when I would come home to my parents' house, it just felt like, oh, everything is okay here. These people get me, they're gonna take care of me, they're gonna make the food that I like, you know, they know me, they love me. And I think it's it's just a even bigger, broader version of that, uh, to go home to God and just talk about anything. Because I see God as the absolute safest, most natural place to land with anything that you have to say.

Tony 5:01

You know, one of the things that's really interesting when you are working in the ministry space is how much you have to explain, you know, different aspects of your faith journey. You know, sharing your testimony, you know, hopefully is is a joyful thing to do and it's something that, you know, can be encouraging to to others when you're in that sort of group, you know, setting. But sometimes it can also be tiring, especially if you have to like type it out or write it out, or you know, it's a it maybe it's a series of of questions, and so if you've ever felt like you've been tired of just having to explain yourself all the time, guess what? You're not alone. And I think this also happens in the disability space a lot. We're having to explain whatever the disability is, you know, to others. But one of the quiet gifts that walking with God uh at least to me, that that we get is that we can come to God just as we are. We don't have to explain anything. He already knows he is with us and starts with us wherever wherever we are. Doesn't mean that we stay there necessarily, but he meets us wherever we are. Our scripture anchor uh for this episode is Isaiah 46, verses 3 and 4, and and they say, Listen to me, you whom I have upheld since your birth, and have carried since you were born, even to your old age and gray hairs, I am he. I am he who will sustain you, I have made you and I will carry you, I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46, these two verses, God's not asking us to prove ourselves or to prove our own strength. He's reminding us that he is there and he's been holding us and really and carrying us since the very beginning. And he's not gonna let us go. He's going to continue to sustain us all the way through our old age and our gray hairs.

Kristy 7:25

I think that a lot of a lot of the the human relationships that we have, there's an effort that's required just so that we I start to say that so that we're understood, but more so that we're not misunderstood. I know that there are moments or days or even seasons where I've been just tired and cross and, you know, not the not the best version of myself. I make, you know, snap judgments. Tony says something and he means only good loving things by it, but I take it badly, or you know, even with somebody that we know so intimately and that we love so much, sometimes it just takes a lot of effort to not be misunderstood and to not misunderstand. I think a lot of times we explain sort of our motives for saying something. For example, I'll share a reel with Tony. And I always want to give some context, right? I'm not like, it's not like I'm sending this to you so that you will be like this guy. It's never like that. It's, you know, it's this is a cool, there's some part of it that I think is cool. And I always want to bring that to his attention, but I always want to lay down that baseline reason for sending it, the motive, uh, so that I'm not misunderstood, so that his feelings aren't hurt. I think also we tend to soften our needs. And that's hard, right? To lessen the intensity of what we really want to ask for, what we really feel like we need in that moment when we go to this person and we want to talk about, you know, this thing. Maybe I'm, I really, really want him to change his mind or her to change her mind. But sometimes we go in and we lessen that. We lessen the intensity so that maybe so that we don't seem so needy, or because it feels like such a big ask, but we want to ask it anyway. And with God, there's none of that. You could ask him for anything. You can go to him as bold as you want to, as bold as you feel, or as meek as a kitten. And it doesn't matter because he he knows already, first of all, what you're what you're wanting and needing. You can say what you want, but he knows your heart. He hears and he understands those whispers in your heart, sometimes even that we can't even say out loud with our mouths. Sometimes we feel things and we just don't even have the words for it. And he he gets that. For neurodiverse people, I think there's a lot of constant self-monitoring. I know for me, I mean, it's not a secret that I have ADHD and I spend a really significant percentage of my life believing that I'm annoying. And I and it's I say it because it's fact. I I annoy myself. I know I annoy other people too. But God doesn't care. Like he doesn't care how chatty I am. He doesn't care if I say 4,000 words to him. But most people would. Most people, you know, here on this side of heaven, they get tired of hearing our words at some point, you know? And it doesn't mean that those relationships are bad. It doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with any of it. We're not too heavy necessarily, or it's nothing like that. It's just people get tired. Going to God is the one place to go where none of this is required. You know, sometimes when I'm I'll have a bad day and I come to Tony and he's like, How's your day? And as much as I love him and I want to share every aspect of my life with him, like I love, you know, I love when he tells me about his day. I love knowing like what he's experienced while we were apart, and I like sharing what I've experienced with him when we're back together. But there's some days where I'm just cross as a wet cat and I'm tired, and it feels not worth the trouble to set the scene and explain all of the elements to bring him up to speed. And I feel cruddy about that because then he feels bad, he feels like he wasn't worth it, and I feel like I was mean and I have to still carry all that grumpiness home and whatever, but that never happens with God. He always, he always knows, he always gets it.

Tony 11:42

And sometimes the heaviness that that we feel it's not because of sin, it's just it's the cost of being human in a world that has limits. With God, you don't have to earn the right to be understood. You just are understood by your creator. There are times when I'm so like laser focused working on something, most likely the podcast or or or you know, the un the unshaken ministry in general, because I am so laser focused on whatever it is, if Christy comes and and asks me a question, you know, I may answer her in a tone that's not nice and loving like I should, and and like I mean, and she's done nothing wrong, I'm not upset with her in any way, but because I'm so focused, the tone that comes out of my mouth makes it seem like I'm annoyed or that I'm not happy with her because my tone wasn't warm and wasn't, you know, maybe cheerful or or patient, or even though in my mind, I'm happy to answer her questions and happy to to, you know, have a you know, moment with her and and you know, be able to help her in in whatever way uh that she needs. But in my own flesh and in my own time, I didn't disconnect from what I was doing. My response is muddied because of my focus. You know, so my motivation gets misread and misunderstood because my tone is off. You know, if I'm honest, that happens uh more often than it should. I need to remind myself, hey, close the laptop screen for a second and actually look at your beautiful wife and and answer her in the in a loving, you know, kind way that that in your head you mean to do so, but your voice didn't convey that message. And so that happens too often.

Kristy 13:54

You guys know that I teach sociology, so I can jump in with a little so on that. One of my very favorite symbolic interactionists um was a guy named Irving Goffman. He first published in 1956 and then um republished here in the States in 1959 this amazing book called The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life. And in that book, he presents the idea of life as dramaturgy, like as a screenplay. Um, and he talks about the roles that we play and the way the different ways that we um interact with different people that we come into contact with. For me, one of the coolest points that he makes in that book is about impression management. And essentially, he talks about that as we go through our days, everybody, everybody that we talk to, everybody that we're um interacting with, the ways that we hold our bodies, like everything that we communicate in all of that, we are managing the the impressions of other people. Like we're managing their impression of us. How are they receiving us? And when you think about how much energy it takes to try to manage how someone else is seeing you instead of just being, and this is a human thing. This isn't, it isn't being duplicitous or two-faced or anything like that. It's it's just how we live, right? We we want to be cool with the people that that that we want to be cool to, and we want to be, you know, we want to be received as loving to the people that we want, you know, to think that we love them and think about the way that you present yourself differently in a like an employment interview versus when you're talking to your spouse. And then think of all of that and compare it to how you feel and how you act when you go to God. And all of that impression management, all of it falls away. However, it comes out, however you say it, whatever you say, it all just flows out with no thought to the other person's reception at all. And isn't that just like the most restful thing to think about? I just feel like that's so cool.

Tony 16:01

And so I want to come back to the scripture. God doesn't just see the moment when you're having a conversation with him, he sees the entire story behind the moment, and he's not surprised by your wiring. Spoiler alert, he wired you that way.

Kristy 16:22

He did.

Tony 16:23

And so your fatigue or your fear or fill in the blank with whatever emotion that you're feeling in the moment. Number one, he's not surprised, but number two, he's not gonna shame you for needing whatever help you need in those moments. Being misunderstood is exhausting because you keep trying to hold yourself up with explanation, but our scripture from Isaiah 46 tells us more than once that we are not meant to hold ourselves up this entire time. We are meant to be carried by the one who created us. He wants to carry us, and he wants us to be that near. Jesus understands the weak spots that we have without any shame. He understands temptations, he understands fatigue, fear, and being overwhelmed, he understands how you were wired, he understands you know the limits that you have, the needs, the wants, the desires. Nothing about you surprises him. He sees the entire system behind everything that you do. It's not that because he understands, he approves everything that we do, because he doesn't, it just means that we don't have to hide who we are. Because again, he's with us and he's gonna go with us, and he wants to shape us as we go. We say it all the time on this podcast, but I'm gonna say it again. This is a process, it's a journey. You don't take a shower when you're clean, you take a shower when you're dirty. Show up to God however you are. That's how He wants you. Show up, and then you and God will walk together through your entire life, and whatever needs to be adjusted, whatever needs to be worked on, you and God are going to work that out. You and God are going are going to work through that stuff, and that's important.

Kristy 18:38

So then to add to what Tony said, you don't have to dress up, you don't have to, you know, clean up, you don't have to be any way but who you are. I grew up where like when we went to church, we dressed up. Like I wore dresses and not just like a cute little like t-shirt dress. Like we dressed up. I remember one time I was in, it would have been like seventh or eighth grade. I went on a basketball tournament over a weekend. It was at a another church, um, you know, another Christian school in the middle of the state. And we went to church that Sunday morning at that church um where that where the the hosting school was based. The other kids had um, if they had pants or, you know, nice looking outfits or whatever, but I had this dress, like a fancy dress, like a dress-up dress. And I felt in that moment, I felt so conspicuous because um, because of what I was wearing with regard to what everyone else was wearing. One of the other kids' moms came up to me because I I was, I must have been looking really upset, and she asked what was going on. And I told her, I said, I just feel weird because I didn't know that we were gonna dress casually for church. And she said, honey, don't you know God doesn't care what you wear to church? He said, He doesn't care. That's your father's house. He just wants you to come home. He doesn't care what you wear. And that has stayed with me my whole life. If it's a reverence thing for you, that's cool. But don't choose your words carefully with God. I mean, I'm not saying be like rude or disrespectful, but you don't have to make anything just so. Um, you can come mid-thought with, you know, not even knowing how you want to wrap up what you're saying. I have come in tears. There have been middle of the nights where something happened. I remember one particular night, I got just some really scary, sad news. And I cried, I was crying as hard as I've probably ever cried in my life, and just yelling out to him, like, please help me. I don't, I don't know how I don't know what to do. I don't know how to fix this. I don't know what to do. And I just called it out. I cried out the words, you know, just as if I had gone to him and said, Father, I have this situation and I don't know how to resolve it. Could you please help me? Like, he doesn't care how you say it. He does, he just wants you to come conversationally, mid-ramble, mid-freaking out in the middle of the night fit. He doesn't care. Like he just doesn't care. He wants you to bring it however it looks, however you look, however you feel, however you are, just take it to him. And in this situation, prayer becomes more like a conversation. Um, it becomes more like an honest, heart-based thing. It becomes a relational thing, not a presentation, not a checkoff, not a, you know, we have to pray at this time, you know, this is something that we always do. It just becomes a God, I need you. I'm here. I want to hang out. I I have to talk about this stuff with you right now. I've said before, for me, that happens a lot of times in the car. I talk to God a lot in the car. And I just talk to him like he's sitting in the seat next to me, as if Jesus was buckled in the seatbelt in the passenger, you know, passenger seat. And I feel like you can do that however you want to. If you're home and you're washing dishes, imagine he's sitting at the table and just chat him up. If you're at work and it's busy and you can just whisper a quick like, please help me, or I'm so scared, or whatever can just come out, whatever you can can muster in that moment, do it. It's not wasted. He gets it. It doesn't have to be complete, it doesn't have to be pretty. Just put it out there for him. He already knows you're coming. He already knows what you have. And he's his arms are stretched out like you're already so welcome with him, just as you are.

Tony 22:49

Having a disability or or if you're caring for someone with a disability, there are moments where your capacity to to do things, it's just a striking diff difference between what the world expects and what God expects. The one thing that has always come to mind for me, um, especially with with Christy and how much she protects me when we are out in the world together, when I fall, which is pretty often she is really firm about let him be, leave him alone. He will tell us what he needs. There are times when I think people hear that and they misunderstand or they misread what's going on.

Kristy 23:42

Yeah, I totally agree.

Tony 23:44

I've had people like pull me aside, and it's kind of funny because oh, she's really mean. Are you guys okay? I'm like, yeah, we're fine. She did that because I asked her to do that. Like, we've had those conversations, and I've I've said to Christy, when I fall, I need you to do that because the instinct of of people, and I get it, it's you know, it's it's well intentioned. But the instinct of most people is to rush in and to try to grab me up under underneath my arms to try to get me to stand up again. But if I don't know that I can hold my own weight, it doesn't matter if if you can pick me up like a sack of potatoes, because I'm gonna go down as soon as you let go. Yeah. I need that 30 to 45 seconds on the ground to just do a quick self-check and make sure that nothing's broken. That I'm gonna, you know, be able to like stand on my own two feet when I get up on my own two feet again. Christy is very firm, you know, with that. And we've kind of learned to say, hey, can you go get us a a chair?

Kristy 25:00

Yeah.

Tony 25:00

You know, especially with you know the people that are like kind of being insistent about helping, she'll gently redirect them and say, Hey, the best way to help is to get them a chair. Can you do that? Can you go grab a chair? And usually it's like, oh yeah, we can go do that. And then and that usually gives me that breathing room to be able to say, Okay, I'm okay. And they bring that chair, and I'm able to pull myself up, dust myself off, and and we move on.

Kristy 25:29

Let me, I'm gonna actually jump in here for a second before you move on, because I have learned, and again, it's this is impression management, but I have learned to say, like, Tony, are you okay? Are your knees okay? Are your elbows okay? Is your back okay? And I'm asking this not because I don't think you know how to check out your own body. It's so that the people that are standing around know that we're all not just standing here ignoring you. You're taking a minute to do that. And I feel like it's sort of like coaching almost them, like, you know, this is his systems check. That's why I'm asking these things. Like, it's funny to I hadn't thought about that until just now, but it is very much a it's like a directive acting with words kind of thing. That's funny. I hadn't thought about that or literally until just now.

Tony 26:17

And I know she's not saying that for my benefit. It's it it is for the benefit of others that are standing around that are, you know, again, with the best of intentions, that they're worried, they're somebody falling is not typical or or quote unquote normal or whatever. So I get it, but that does buy us the time that I need in order to be able to get up off the ground safely, and that's that's the ultimate goal is to be able to do this safely to where I don't further injure myself because of somebody being in a hurry or somebody being in a rush. When we have that mindset of being carried, for lack of a better word, we we embrace being carried by our father. Here's what happens we stop grasping for control. And sometimes that's the hardest thing for us to do.

Kristy 27:15

It is. So I'm just gonna say, dear listeners, we did not talk about this at all this week. I'm about to put Tony on the spot. Could I ask you for a minute to talk about Beautiful Outlaw and the nature of Jesus in that relational sense?

Tony 27:33

Yeah, so Beautiful Outlaw is one of my favorite books. It's a book by John Eldridge. Um, if you've never read the book, please run, don't walk, run to your favorite bookstore or to Amazon or wherever you get your books and go get a copy of that. Just to be clear, we are not sponsored. Although, John, if you hear this, holla at your boy. But I absolutely do love that book. One of the big things uh that I took away from that book is when you read that book, you get so sort of this like 3D image of Jesus, and it's so beautiful, forgive the pun. It truly is about just how much he wants to be in that relationship and how much he does truly care. I'm not sure if I'm answering your question well.

Kristy 28:32

Um what brought it to mind is thinking about going to Jesus with with any old thing. And I feel like so often we think of Father God and we think of Jesus as like so well-behaved and so like majestic, and so you know, we think of the power and we think of him as the almighty, and you know, we go all reverent, and and sometimes I think that reverence can maybe cause us to want to tiptoe a little bit. And I just the reason I asked you to talk about Beautiful Outlaw is that Jesus didn't tiptoe and he doesn't want us to tiptoe.

Tony 29:11

Yeah, he absolutely did not tiptoe, he didn't tiptoe anywhere he went, he went with a direct purpose, he knew what that purpose was, and he lived it out unapologetically. And at the same time, he was also so playful with those that he loved and those that honestly that he was discipling, and he interacted with everyone wherever they were. You know, I'm thinking about like the woman at the well, all of his disciples, the the guy with leprosy that that he healed after giving the most famous sermon of all, the Sermon on the Mount. It's so beautiful. Comes down from the mountain after after giving his best sermon, meets this this guy with leprosy, and he can heal this guy just with the word. He's done it before. But not only does he say you're healed, but he reaches out and he touches the man. It is such a beautiful picture of Jesus just understanding how important it was to come to that place of of not just healing the leprosy, but healing the the social stigma that this guy had endured for years from no physical touch at all. Just how God wants to be in that same space, we have that same opportunity. Like God wants to carry us in all of our stuff, in all of our neural you know, divergence and all of our just quirkiness, like God loves it all, and He just He wants to carry every piece of that. When we agree to be carried by God, w we're not grasping for control, and honestly, that steadiness will then spill into every other part of our lives. It's gonna spill into our marriage, it's gonna spill into the way that we parent, it's gonna spill into our friendships, the our the way that we interact with our coworkers, with with our bosses, just just people out in in in the community because we're not we're not so focused on maintaining this like death grip on control. And so it's it's not perfect. But we're gonna be softer, steadier, we're gonna be more gracious, and man, do we need to not only experience more grace, but we need to give more grace all day, every day. And we get into this place of accepting being carried by God. We stop apologizing for for just existing, which especially if you have any sort of disability, it is the easiest thing to do. I am forever saying to people, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I I I say I'm sorry so much that it annoys Christy, like it, like she's like, Stop saying you're sorry, you got nothing to apologize for.

Kristy 32:33

It's just sad. Like, you don't deserve that. You don't deserve to feel sorry, you don't take up too much space, you don't, you're not difficult or inconvenient, like you don't owe that. You don't.

Tony 32:47

That is the hardest thing for me to sort of grasp. And again, if you're living with a disability, you understand what I'm about to say. For so much of my life, I have felt like a burden. I have felt like I didn't belong. Like I didn't deserve to be heard to be understood, to be taken seriously. That anything that I said mattered or had importance And so I apologized all over myself anytime something had to be done or I had to move something or go somewhere because I always felt like a burning. I'm still working on this, um I I'm not delivered from this because there's still too many times where I say I'm sorry. And there are still many times where I feel like I'm a burden. Pray for me, guys. Um in in that space because I'm still trying to get out of that.

Kristy 34:06

Those are the trappings of human relationship, right? Like that's that's what we're talking about is that's what it is to be human. That's what it is to talk to people, that's what it is to interact when we're having to manage the impressions of somebody else. But God does not see you like that. God sees you as his prince. He, I mean, I think God probably thinks you're funny and cool and smart, I mean, insightful, beautiful, loving, like because you're authentic with him. Like when we go to God as the absolute most authentic versions of ourselves, and when we I think when we spend time and relationship with him in that authentic place, first of all, he's super happy because we've come to him the way he asks us to, and we don't apologize because we don't like this. We just we know, right? We know that he absolutely he gets our context, like he's just waiting for us to come and talk to him, not like people, not like your best friend or your spouse or anybody. It's so much cooler than that. But when you practice that and you spend time in that authentic space with him in that relationship, back to what Tony was saying, it is so much easier to come back to people with that. It's easier to come back to your spouse with that same sense of authenticity and just openness. And it's almost like a humility, not in a I feel less than, but just in a like, I got no pride. I'm not here to to posture in any way, right? I just want to share. And you are so much better, Tony, about that than you used to be. And for whatever it's worth, God gave you me to take a little swipe at you when you apologize unnecessarily. Because that is, he does not see you as anything other than really awesome. So really high-quality guy.

Tony 36:17

I appreciate that, honey. When we are more comfortable in in that space, marriage grows steadier. Parenting just gets to a point where where even parenting is steadier. The boundaries that that we're able to have are are healthy, and we get to a point where where we're not apologizing for those boundaries. We just we just have them. And we have them from a place of understanding that we don't have to apologize for having boundaries. And again, like I said before, grace just flows more freely from us to others, and we are a world that is in need of more grace all over the place. If you are in a place where you only have enough strength to whisper to God, that's enough. It's okay. The invitation is not about cleaning yourself up and coming squeaky clean to him. The invitation from God is to come home and come home to the one who has been carrying you, even though you're kicking and screaming if you haven't realized it, but also come home to the one who wants to carry you and wants to carry you every single day.

Kristy 37:52

So, um, I guess in just in in wrap-up, there is no need to perform to manage impressions or expectations with God. We do not have to give him the background information. It's all it's all already there. He knows everything about us. He knows the hairs on our heads, the thoughts in our heads, the thoughts in our hearts, the feelings that we carry. He knows what happened to you today. He knows what happened and how embarrassing it felt or how exciting it was. I mean, he remembers everything. He knows every detail that you've ever experienced. And so for him, he always has context. It's just a matter of going with absolute, just sheer authenticity. And like Tony said, if it's just a whisper, if it's just a help me, I need you, he's going to. That's he he heard you. I promise you he heard you, and he will. If you're the other end of things and you just have all these words that just are chasing around in your head like leaves in the wind, like just swirling and swirling. Get in the car and spew them out. Um, that's what I do. I just I say all my words to him, and and it unburdens me. I just put them out there and I know that he will catch them and hold them in his hands. And the dumb ones or the to me less valuable or or just sound stupid or whatever. He treasures them just like the other ones. I know he does. And so, whatever it is, how however you are, whoever you are, show up to him just like that and spend a lot of time there. Spend as much time in relationship with him as you feel like you possibly can. Because, like we said just a few minutes ago, that comfort level that you get in that place of absolute authenticity will spill over into your human interactions and they will also get just easier and healthier uh as a result of the time that you spent with God. And isn't that like part of it, right? I I remember not that many years ago asking out loud, if God already knows everything, why do we even have to pray? Why do we even have to say it if he already knows? And he wants the relationship. He absolutely wants that relationship urgently. He wants us to come to him for anything, with anything. He just wants to live our lives right alongside us. But he also wants for us the benefits that come back to us outside that relationship because we are in that relationship. It just makes us better. It gives us better, gives us better language, better filter, better. I keep saying the word, but authenticity. That's that's what it is. And because of that gift, the gift that we can pray anytime, we can spend time with him anytime, anywhere. We don't need an appointment, we don't have to wear shoes, you know, we can sit at his feet or curl up in his lap or cry out to him from a pit that we don't even know how we'll possibly ever get out of. And wherever we are, he hears us and he wants us to cry out, to say those words, to just be there with him because he loves us that much. And while we're at it, he, you know, sin separates us from God, right? We are sinful people, but he loves us so much and he wants to be in relationship with us so urgently, so badly, that he gave his son, his baby, to die for us so that we could have that relationship with him. And if if you think ever for one moment of your life that he might not think that you're important or that God might not care much what you have to say because you're just a regular old person or there's nothing special about you, you are so special that he gave his baby, he gave his son, he let him grow up and he gave him up for you, for me, for all of us. Um, and because Jesus died and was resurrected, we can go to God anytime we want to with anything we have to say. And I I don't know a greater gift or a greater, more all-encompassing, comprehensive love than that. There's there's nothing that that stands up to the love of God. There is just it's the most beautiful thing, and and it's for you. It's for all of us. So go as you are. He knows whatever it is, he understands, and he loves you. He has just tremendous empathy and love, and he just wants to hear your words, the whispers, the cries, and the chatty chatterson stuff, too, all of it. Friends, I wanted to ask if this episode brings you joy or comfort or safety or a new perspective on things, share it with a friend. Please uh just send the link from wherever you listened. You'll be able to just send that link. If you want to go a little deeper with it, you know, go online. There's gonna be posts regarding it on our social media, Facebook, Instagram, and just interact. Like we're there. Like that's us. There's nobody except Tony and me that does our social media. So literally, if you have something that you want to say, go type it in, respond to one of the posts or whatever, and one of us will respond to you. I'm gonna just say a little prayer. God, thank you that you know us all so completely, that you know every detail of our wiring, that you know our circumstances, that you know all of our context without us ever having to even say a word about it. You know our limits, you know our needs, you know what our hearts just long for, whether we know it or not, whether we even have the words or even the awareness you you already know. Thank you that we can come to you honestly to know that you will hear our words and just hold them so dear because you love us so much. Thank you that you want that relationship with us, and thank you for what you sacrificed in order that we can have that relationship with you. Please just help us to be mindful and to come to you with just honesty and openness and authenticity with no fear and just in the knowledge that you love us and that you're super excited to hear from us anytime that we just turn your way. Um help us to do better every day and just please let the glory from everything that we do just be reflective to you and of you. And um just we love you so much. Uh please bless our friends, each one that that has any need in her heart or his heart, please just just fix it. Love them and and just meet them where they are and encourage them to do the same, to meet you also where they are. Um, we ask all of this in the beautiful name of your beautiful outlaw son Jesus. Amen.

Tony 45:20

Amen. Thank you guys. Hope you guys have a great day and a great rest of your week. And we'll see you next time. Bye, friends.